Lifestyle boudoir photography: more than the stereotypes
- Caroline Nijs
- Sep 23
- 3 min read
Boudoir photography is often misunderstood. Search for it online and you’ll find endless lingerie shots in hotel rooms, sold as “the perfect gift for your partner.”
That’s one version — but it’s not the only one, and for many people, it’s not the point.
In my work, boudoir is about creating an honest space where you can see yourself without filters — literal or otherwise. A space where you set the pace, choose how much you want to show, and walk away with images that feel like you.
What my lifestyle boudoir photography really means
The word boudoir comes from a French term for a woman’s private sitting room or bedroom.
In photography, it started out as an intimate way of capturing someone in a personal space.
Over time, the style was shaped by commercial photography and advertising — often leaning heavily into sexualised imagery aimed at a male audience.
That history still influences how boudoir is seen today. For many, it’s tied to lingerie catalogues or glossy “sexy” portraits.
But boudoir doesn’t have to be that. It can also be a form of portraiture that values:
Choice over expectation
Individuality over trends
Presence over posing
At its core, my lifestyle boudoir is about making space for someone to be seen in a way they choose — whether that’s in their birthday suit, sexy lace, or wrapped in their favourite blanket (and nothing else).
How my lifestyle boudoir photography differs
I don’t work from a fixed studio. Every session takes place in a setting that feels personal — your home, or somewhere that matters to you. This keeps the atmosphere, and you, relaxed and grounded.
I don’t use heavy styling or rigid setups. Instead, we work with the light, textures, and surroundings that already exist.
You decide what you want to wear — if anything — and how you want to move. My role is to guide, not dictate.
Every body is welcome here. Every identity is welcome here.
I don’t retouch or reshape bodies, because I believe in creating images you can recognise yourself in. The final photographs are not a “better” version of you — they are simply you, as you are, in moments worth holding onto.
Who it's for — and who it's not for
My lifestyle boudoir is for people who:
Want to see themselves without the weight of someone else’s standards
Want images that feel true, not stylised
Rarely see themselves represented in boudoir photography, and want to claim that space here
It’s not for people who:
Want highly polished glamour images
Are looking for an elaborate “sexy gift” for someone else
This is for you first, and anyone else second.
Common misconceptions about boudoir
“It’s only for women.”
Not true.
Boudoir is for anyone who wants to be seen in a more personal, intimate way — regardless of gender identity.
“You have to go nude.”
You don’t.
Some people do, but it’s never a requirement. You choose how far the undressing goes 😉
“You need to be confident first.”
Again, you don’t.
Confidence comes during the session, when you see yourself in a way you haven’t before. And you find you are actually having fun.
Final toughts
My lifestyle boudoir photography gives you the chance to see yourself without apology, outside of anyone else’s idea of beauty.
For some, that means soft light and lace. For others, it’s unbuttoned jeans and bare feet. And for some, it’s leather or restraint — a rawer edge to intimacy. Either way, the images become a reminder that you already belong in your own skin.
If you’ve ever wondered what it might feel like to see yourself this way, I’d be happy to talk about it with you. No sales talk, just a conversation to explore possibilities.
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